The Wedding Presents Conundrum

If youve attended a wedding in last several years and you probably have then youve had to make some decisions about wedding presents. These days, brides and grooms make choosing a gift easy too easy, some might say. Gigantic chain stores such as Macys, Crate and Barrel, Pottery Barn, Target (and so many more) offer computerized wedding registry services. With the ease of web-browsing and online shopping, purchasing wedding presents off a couples registry is now as easy as pointing and clicking.

But this convenience raises another question. Has shopping for wedding presents become too impersonal, too mechanical? When you buy wedding presents off a registry, it drains the gift of that personal touch which makes gift-giving special in the first place. After all, you didnt really pick out the present; the bride and groom chose it. You just found something that matched your price point and bought it. When the happy couple uses the nonstick muffin pan or the high tech coffee maker you bought them, will they think of you with gratitude? Or will they soon forget who gave what, and think of you as one of many semi-anonymous contributors to their domestic comfort?

On the other hand, there is much to be said for registries beyond simple convenience. Long gone are the days of newlyweds receiving fifteen toasters and twelve serving platters. Clashing china sets are no longer an issue. With wedding registries, couples can be sure theyll get the wedding presents that they actually want and need. They wont have to make returns, or live with gifts which dont suit their tastes or match their dcor. In the end, gift-giving is about providing the recipients with something they will enjoy, not feeding the ego of the gift-giver. If it makes the bride and groom happy, then the wedding gift has certainly done its job. And if you buy wedding presents off the registry, you know for certain your gifts will be well received.

Still, its hard to shake the feeling that some of the magic is gone. Dont you want the wedding presents you give to show that you put thought into them? Dont you want them to have a personal touch?

So, how can you guarantee that the wedding presents you buy will be enjoyed, while still having that unique quality that says they came specifically from you and no-one else? Unfortunately, there is no such guarantee.

The truth is that giving wedding presents that arent on the bridal registry is a risk. If you feel very strongly that you have a personal message to send to the newlyweds, then you can send that message in a note or card rather than a gift. Or, you can always buy two gifts one off the registry, and one you picked out yourself. Of course, you can always simply give money, which is never especially unique or individual, but will certainly be appreciated.

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